What makes old men cranky?
My father is normally a coherent and sensible man but every now and then his temper flares and he becomes the most irrational Dutch man you have ever met. He is steamy and volatile and tends to wander off in a rant or tirade of wrong doings of all those he has known in a life time.
My mother , the saint, (not really) is the brunt of his tirade and he threatens to leave and pack up his caravan and car as soon as he has permission from his doctor that he can drive the car - that will be never, and heaven help us all if he is allowed in the car.
When I go visit, I tend to go in to damage control. Its best not to try to contradict him when he is raving on about relatives that are far away and cant be harmed by his tirade, but when it comes to mum I tend to be a little more out spoken
Small indiscretions of habit are put up to ridicule and dad tends to berate her for her religious beliefs. I believe that we are all entitled to put faith in what we wish, so long as that belief is not pushed upon another person in an uncomfortable manner. Many a people have an animated debate about the pro and cons of religion and lifestyle but are able to walk away, may be taking away a different view point but not criticized for their own view. What harm does it do to attend church on a regular basis especially if you are prepared to help others in your belief. My father can always find an argument against the wrongs he has been done
It cant possibly be a reflective process as it is irrational and cruel.
Can it be that he is overly tired and coupled with previous cranial bleed (which caused a distinct change in character) that he is just acting out to sort out his thoughts, clear the cupboards and sweep the floorbaords , so that he can once again manage his life and perhaps (or hopefully) be at peace.
I keep on telling him to breathe. Inhale Exhale ....consider that we are so fortunate to live the lifestyle we live, with people whom are caring enough to witness our process and forgive us when we make it extremely difficult to like them. Dad is such a giving person and his tirade is such a stark contrast to the person he normally is...It makes me cautious as a nurse and daughter to wonder what is really going on with him
I am sure the storm will pass but what damage will it cause..be mindful of the words we speak to others.
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